Valentine's Day Doesn't Count

I am thankful for you. I am so incredibly thankful for you.

This is our 10^th Valentine’s Day as husband and wife. 

10. 

If it weren’t for the extra pounds I am sporting and the few extra grey hairs you are rocking, I wouldn’t believe it could be true.

But here we are. 

You have never loved Valentine’s Day.  You have always said that it is just another day of the year and real love should be shown all the other 364 days of the year, not just the one that everyone says is supposed to be about love. 

That used to irritate me.  It caused many tears on many Valentine’s Day’s.  I felt jibbed. I wanted flowers and chocolates and romantic getaways.  I wanted love notes and poems and gifts.   I wanted so much more those days.  I wanted you to somehow prove you loved me by showering me with affection and attention on Valentine’s Day.

But today as I sat across from you at our impromptu breakfast, and I watched you answer your phone and take notes in your little black notepad…as I watched you do the things you do everyday, I was so overwhelmed with gratefulness for you and for our marriage. 

And I wasn’t grateful because ours is exceptional or easy or romantic or extraordinary.  I was grateful because it is messy and hard and rich and lovely and good.   

I was grateful because I was sitting across the table from you.

I can still remember the day I knew that I loved you.  We were just babies.  I was only 21.  You were only 24.  We had gone for a “run.”  (Quotations have to be used because I am certain I have never actually “run” in my whole life…even calling it jogging would be a stretch.)

Anyway, we had gone for that “run” and of course within 15 minutes, I was whining about being tired.  We stopped.  The sun was just starting to really shine, and you said we should sit and finish watching it come up over the mountain. 

We sat on the edge of a cow pasture.  You asked me if we could pray.

You started praying and stopped mid-sentence.  You looked up…peered right into my eyes and said; “I think I would like to hold your hand while we pray if that’s okay.” 

Tenderly, you took my hand and laced your fingers in between mine, and you started praying once again.

I didn’t know then that someday you really would be mine.  I didn’t know that someday we would be sitting across the table on a Tuesday, the kids at school, work still to be done, but you just choosing to take a few minutes to spoil me on the so-called day of love.

 I didn’t know then what I do now. 

But I knew that I loved you.  I knew that if God gave us a chance I could love you for all the days of my life forever and always.

This marriage thing is really hard.  I haven’t always been the most understanding and supportive wife.  We have both chosen to be selfish at times.  We have gone to bed angry and woken up even angrier.  We have said things that we later regretted.  We haven’t always gotten it right all the time. 

But I wouldn’t change this life we have built together for anything.

Thank you for choosing me.  Not just today but every day.  Thank you for pushing me and believing in me and supporting me.  Thank you for loving me.

Thank you for showing me that a marriage worth having is always going to be much more than a romantic Valentine’s Day.   Thank you for building a life with me that is made up of much more than flowers and chocolate and extravagant gifts.

Thank you for choosing to still hold my hand all these years later. 

You are my most cherished Valentine, but more than that, you are my most beloved one, my husband.